Small talk is the polite kind of chat that strangers, colleagues and friends use in native English conversations to greet each other, get conversations started, and to get to know more about each other.
Most conversations in English, and in many languages around the world, begin with a greeting. In English you’ll find formal and informal greetings that can be used in various situations.
Formal ways to greet someone include:
- It’s a pleasure to meet you
- Good morning/afternoon/evening
Some informal greetings
- What’s up? – this is an informal way to say: how are you?
Questions are an important part of conversational English. It’s polite to ask about another person, to find out more about them, and to get to know them.
Generally when people start a conversation in English with someone they know it’s polite to enquire about how the other person is.
- How’s it going?
- Hi, how are you?
- How’s your day going?
- Having a busy day?
- How’s life?
- How’s everything?
And there are some basic questions that you can ask anyone, anywhere.
- What’s your name?
- Where do you live?
- Where are you from?
- What do you do?
The type of questions you ask someone in a conversation depend on various factors.
How well you know the person
You would speak more formally to someone you’ve never met, to a work colleague, or to someone older than you. You would speak more casually to a good friend, and to people in your own age group.
It’s a good idea to wait until someone speaks casually with you before you speak casually with them. You may find that people will begin to use casual greetings with you over time, as you get to know each other better.
Someone you’ve just been introduced to:
- Nice to meet you!
- Pleased to meet you!
- How do you two know each other?
- So, what do you do for a living? – this means what do you do for a job?
- How long have you been doing that?
Someone you haven’t seen for a while:
- How are you keeping?
- What have you been doing lately?
- How’s your family?
- Long time no see!
Where you are
If you meet in the workplace, you may want to talk more formally. If you meet in a more casual environment, like at a party, in a bar, at a concert, or at the theatre you can talk more casually too.
Wherever you meet, you can talk about something you have in common. For example, if you’ve met at a party you could ask:
- How do you know (the host of the party/the person who has introduced you to each other)?
- Would you like a drink?
- I love this song – do you like this kind of music?
It’s polite to ask a person questions about themselves when you meet them, but it’s also important to respond to questions they’ve asked you. This helps to keep the conversation flowing.
You can combine your answers with follow-up questions based on information the other person is giving you. For example, if someone mentions they used to live in New York you could say:
- Oh, you lived in New York? How long did you live there?
- I’ve never been to New York; did you enjoy living there?
- I loved visiting New York. Are there things you miss about living there?
Mirroring, or repeating some of the things the other person has said to you or asked you is a polite and easy way to respond too. For example:
- Hi, I’m Anna. It’s nice to meet you
Hi, I’m John. It’s nice to meet you too
- Hi, I’m Anna. Are you enjoying the party?
Hi, I’m John. Yeah, it’s been great! Are you enjoying it too?
Having a conversation outside of the classroom can be more challenging – but don’t give up! The more practice you have in the real world the better, and English speakers will be happy to help you.
When you’re listening to someone during a conversation focus on the words you recognise and understand more than the words you don’t.
You can practise by listening to conversations native English speakers have with each other on the radio, in interviews online, in movies, TV shows and more. Listen out for useful questions and expressions you can use in your own conversations in the future.
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